Thought From my Heart

Every Situation Has Their Song

2011-08-04T13:51:00.000-07:00

Every songs created by people has their own story. Some songs tell love story, break up, family issues, friendship or anything. But don't we think it also works the other way? That every situation can has their song as well.

Yes, every situations has their reason. And of course God put good reasons and purposes and not a bad one. That is why we actually always has reason to be thankful in any situation. Or in other word we supposed to always have a singing heart in any situation, because when we are thankful miraculously God will pour joy for our soul.

Things happened to me lately made me hard to find the reason to be joyful. But My God so good =) He placed some people and let them be His vessel to pass His Joy and Peace for me. I felt like failures after failures were attacking me, pushing me back and down under fruz and depression (seriously sounds sarcastic). Worries and fear also come at the same time without patiently queue until my upset feeling because of failures gone. I ended up looking for physical help as well as doing my best to plan accordingly with my own strength. Keep trying to swim to the surface to get the air and to be able to breath freely, but I ended up losing my breath and almost dead. Thank God He didn't let me dying hopelessly, at the right time He gives me peace through His revelation.

Actually kind a hard to hear His voice lately, I felt so away from Him. I was expecting for help but help never come. While waiting I kept dwelling on my own strength.

Sometimes God's help is like helping a drowning person. It is easier to help them when they choose to not using their own strength and let the helper help them. Because when they are panic and tried to grip anything with their hands and moved their legs to stay floated, it will be hard for the helper to bring them up to the surface. Sometimes God wants us to let go our own strength and trust our life in Him, our Helper. It is easier for us to listen to His word when we surrender to Him rather than keeping our pride of our own strength.

And yes! I want to start surrendering my life to Him now. Maybe I have been too relied to my own life plan, while actually God has the better one for me. Well I might not know what God has stored for my future, but as I wait now I still want to do my best until the last fight. I dont want to be to slack, slumber and do nothing neither will I be too panic and expecting another "UnGodly" help.

Although failures after failures might have come and will come again but I want to stay strong with Him until the last battle of my waiting. I thank God for the problems in my life, They actually keeps me back to my first love to Him. That is my song! What is yours for your problem?

Rambo

2011-06-01T01:26:00.000-07:00

I remember when i was 10, my dad bought me and my brother a dog. His name was rambo, a doberman dog. He was not a puppy, well trained and looked so sad and calm when we took him from his previous owner.

He looks like Rambo

Its not him, but Rambo was that kind of dog.
He was very close with my dad. Energetic move a lot and obedient.
I was just a kid back then i didn't really notice that Rambo was actually a loving dog.

One day my dad bought us another two puppies, Mercy and Hunter.
eventually he felt that he can't take care of the three dogs at the same time.
So, he decided to sell Rambo.

I remember, i went back from school and Rambo's next owner is in our house to take Rambo back with him.
I went to see Rambo, and i saw a face that i can never forget the whole my life. In fact i still remember the face until now. A very sad and calm face, the same as the time we buy Rambo from the previous owner.

Now I am 22, and still clearly remember Rambo's face when we sold him.
Anyway i dont know where rambo is now. Whether he is alive and loved or the opposite.
Now i miss him.
I was thinking of getting my self a dog companion lately, after a lot of thought about Rambo. And of course if it is possible.
a Poodle or Pomeranian

Pomeranian

Me Turned 22

2011-04-22T11:30:00.000-07:00

Its a late blog post, my birthday was 2 weeks a go but i didn't have much time online. =) being away from family during birthday is not a preferable thing for me. I love to spend my birthday with my family. This year birthday, i cant go back to Jakarta due to the coming assignments and Final Year Project submission date. However i had wonderful loving people around me on my birthday and awesome celebration prepared by them. =) I thank God for everyone of them. For their smiles, greetings, prayers and of course presents.

Cake surprise by my housemates + my Dan + dewiii =)

I can actually feel the vibe of surprise, since everything that they do sounds so strange for the whole day.but still I can't hold my smile at all that night. Thanks all....
After that i opened my gift. Cute scented doll and photo frames from my housemates and an Instax Mini Polaroid Camera from Daniel. =)

I think I am into Polaroid now after I have this <3

It didn't stop there, they still surprised me with sweet (errr yea sweet except the part that my housemates bought me a monkey birthday card and wrote down that the monkey is me). Dan also give me a special handmade card with handwriting greetings from super unexpected people (Seriously amazed me =) )

They asked me to posed like monkey

Handmade Bday Card From Dan =)

Another special greeting came from my best girls, with their fun, entertaining and outstanding pictures. =) I love them.


super outstanding people


My Puiy <3

My Ditty =)

And of course I wont forget about the phone call made by my family =) although we are separated by distance, it wont reduce the power of prayer that they sent to me.
Lastly I really thank God for these people in my life who spared their time to celebrate my birthday =). I truly appreciate all of your love and effort in made the day amazing =).

my ever loving dan

These cute and caring boys

I
from left to right (Dewi, Pupu, Nadiah, Nati, Rachel and Me)

Lets Build Meaningful Relationship - By Shirley Boon

2011-04-22T08:02:00.000-07:00

a very recommended article written by Shirley Boon. I found it very informational, useful and relevant. =) enjoy reading this article people ...

A special feature article written for CHCKL BULLETIN Feb 26-27, 2011.
Over the past 10 years of being in the Pastoral ministry, I realize that one of the best ways to impact lives is by investing our time and energy to build meaningful relationships with people around us. I’ve learnt that being ‘relational’ doesn't mean you’re building meaningful relationship’.

Very often we become too occupied with tasks, events and even our ‘ministries’ and neglect building genuine relationships with the people around us. Thus, though many are still actively serving and striving for achievements, they are actually suffering silently from loneliness and rejection behind their masks of busyness.

Nobody is meant to be a loner, especially when you’re in this cool church! ☺

Here are 10 things I’ve learnt in my life that I’m trying my best to apply daily:

1. Learn To Communicate With Openness
A ‘Relationship breakdown’ is usually due to the lack of communication and too much of assumptions. Openness is one of the keys to build meaningful relationship. Learn to share your heart openly and communicate your thoughts in order to clarify, connect (understand) and then only conclude a matter.

2. Say No to Gossip!
Very often a ‘get-together’ or ‘hangout’ session can easily turn into a gossip party. We gotta be watchful of this deadly habit! If you really have to discuss about someone else (where most of the time is none-of-your-business), be sure your discussion is out of love and provides solutions for him/her to be a better person!

3. Cease to Judge Or Criticize
There are too many judges around us! Everyone likes to play ‘judge’, but only God is our judge, so let the others be silent. Judgment and criticism are simply seeing yourself as superior. Stop judging and learn to put grace on your lips by praising and encouraging others!

4. Don't Be Jealous, Be Zealous!
Jealousy can burn down a house. It destroys beautiful relationships. Guard your heart and do not allow comparison, competition and jealousy to creep into your life and caus you to turn into a selfish beast. Learn to celebrate joys and successes with others! Be zealous in love.

5. Let’s Be Real. Nobody likes a ‘fake’.
If everyone is relating to each other behind a mask, then all relationships are superficial. No wonder there are so many lonely souls out there! Let’s be real to each other. If they can’t accept you for who you really are, then what’s the point of having them in your life anyway? Take off your mask today!

6. Kick Out The ‘Offenses’
Keeping offenses in your heart is like having a bullet in your soul. Let me warn you that keeping offenses is highly destructive. It can even destroy a strong relationship if it is not dealt with soon enough. The way to remove offenses is to forgive as Christ has forgiven you. Remember, it is a choice!

7. They are not YOU, you are not THEM
Never impose your standards on others. You are not God. Have you met people where only their standards are ‘THE’ standards? It’s stressful hanging out with such people. We can’t expect everyone to like what we like because everyone is unique! We should celebrate diversity and appreciate uniqueness. If you think this is cool and they don't think so, love them anyway! ☺

8. Walk The Talk – Show Love and Empathy!
Yes! “Show” it with actions and not just your words. The best sermons preached are those sermons applied. Talk is cheap… living it may cost you everything. Let’s not become too mechanical in the way we care and love others. Let’s be human! Learn to empathize with them and you will win them over because there are indeed not many who ‘truly care’.

9. Putting Others First!
Has anyone told you yet? You’re NOT the center of the universe! Therefore, don't just think about yourself all the time. Abstain from the selfishness that dresses itself in many disguises. If you can start dying to yourself, you can then start living for others. Learn to esteem others better than yourself!

10. I Believe In You!
Believing in people is a great way to build meaningful relationship. I don't believe in building relationship by just ‘scratching the surface’. Go into that person’s life and minister to him/her is the best way to get connected. Don't condemn anyone. Learn to believe in people (with wisdom and discernment), you will win many friends.

Remember, success is not determined by how much money and fame you possess but by the fruits of meaningful relationships you’ve cultivated. The rich and famous may one day still die a lonely man.

So, let’s cultivate fresh love in our hearts and work on our relationships with one another. We are only as strong as our weakest link!
Why don't you make it your aim this year to restore broken relationships & start building meaningful relationships!

Love God, Love people, Love life!
Shirley Boon
(this article copy pasted from http://shirleyboon7.blogspot.com/2011/03/lets-build-meaningful-relationships.html)
Shirley Boon - Consecrated Yet Contemporary 聆命之页: LET’S BUILD MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS!

Who Are We To Judge?

2011-04-12T21:08:00.000-07:00

It is common nowadays for every human to judge someone or something based on their appearance or even their past and background. Look around that the enemy had planted judgmental arrows in a lot of God creation's hearts.

http://www.thejakartaglobe.com/opinion/malaysian-muftis-poco-poco-ban-is-divisive/434732

this news site reported on how some people's perception towards a dance. some people banned some celebrity to work in entertainment industry based on their past bad news about that particular person. some people banned yoga or anything because of the other religious element inside it. ironicaly its also happened among us, some of us won't make friend to someone who has bad past because we are afraid that we are going to be affected by that person. or some of us judge someone is this kind of person or that kind of person because of things that they are say and they do in the present.
the truth is ''There is not a wise man among you, not even one, who will be able to judge between his brethen"
(1 Cor6:5)
its not our right to judge whether a dance is a bad influence for the community because its originated from a different culture. we should come back to our heart on what our intention is when we are dancing that dance.
it is not our right to banned someone to do his job or work. because its not us who give that person a job but its God.are we questioning God's plan on other people's life?
and we dont have the right to mistreat people because of our own perception toward that people and because of other people perception towards him or her. because we are not the one who knows every details in that person's life, even that person might not know every details in their life. only God knows.
we better learn how to see beyond the situation in the past and present, and start to change our glasses with a wider accepting perspective. eventhough our mind and thought are limited, our God is not limited He can use anything and anyone regardles of their pasts, backgrounds, mistakes and failures to be a blessing for His work and for His people. When that person has their bad time period, it just that person is in his or her process of life in God shapping them to be a better person.for life is not stagnant it is progressing. and the higher you go the stronger the wind. and we will never go higher if we avoid the wind face it and go through it. let us strengthen ourselves in God to cut the wind. in the end God not look at our situation but our heart respond towards that situation. lets be grateful and keep doing our best in everything that we do. For of Him and through Him and to Him are all things, to whom be glory forever. Amen. (Rom11:36)

Gossiping and scratching

2011-03-15T07:13:00.000-07:00

Have you ever feel itchy and you want to scratch it sooo bad but your mom not allowing you to scratch? i know that's frustrating.
I am having an allergic right now. my skin turned into pinkish red and feel so itchy. i really want to scratch it, but i know it will create infections and will leave scars on my skin. i really don't want that to happen. but i kind a imagine, if i scratch it, it will feel soooooo gooooooooddddddd. but hmmmm without i realize it will actually make me feel itchier.

well, according to this website http://www.skinvitality.ca/blog/2010/11/itchy-skin :

"Although scientists aren’t really sure why we scratch to relieve and itch, they do know that itchiness tends to get worse if you scratch the affected area. There are three possible reasons for this:

1. Scratching the epidermis (the outer layer of the skin) makes it thicker, which can make it itchier.

2. Scratching can break the skin and make it more vulnerable to infection – and infection can make it itchier, not to mention cause a bigger problem like scarring and pigmentation irregularities.

3. Scratching becomes a habit, and a mindless reflex to an itch. The more you scratch, the more the area feels itchy, and the more you scratch. It’s a vicious cycle that you must consciously stop."

In order for me to ease my itchiness feeling :D i typed this random blog and linked the itchiness into a totally different scenario, which is gossip. after meditating my random thought, i find itchiness quite similar with gossip.
have you ever consciously or unconsciously dislike someone and find your self really want other people to know what he/she did wrong and secretly hoping that the other person will agree with you?
ahh yaa, thats definitely the symptom of you are about to commit a gossip activity =D...
you eagerly want other people to know bad things about him/her, like the itchiness that you massively, eagerly, desperately want to scratch.
and then, when you release the things about the person you dislike and find out that the third person don't agree with it, you will try to find more evidences and arguments to prove that your points are right, And when you finally get the third party agree with what ever motives she/he has, you will feel relieved for awhile.
Like the itchiness the more you scratch the more you want to scratch it harder and wider until you feel satisfied.
However, after awhile you will regret that you have scratched it, because you will feel even more itchy until it feels painful. Because the more you scratch the bigger possibility you will get infections and get your skin bleeding. the same thing with gossip the more you entertain your itchiness to talk about that person the bigger the opportunity it will rob the joy from your heart and get your heart infected with the 'bitterness disease' towards that person.
For example when that person getting a promotion you will be sad and compare him/her to your self. or when there is other people agreed, appraised, valued, loved, cared with him/her you will get upset (*mostly unconsciously).
You gtta be watch out, it is a heart disease =D.

and anything related to heart will not be easily cured, although there is a reconciliation between you and that person the scars might still be there. the same with the itchiness, after you scratch then caused an infection bleeding after it dried, and then it will be a scar on your skin.
Then. as the copied article above mentioned, scratching itchiness will create a habit of scratching whenever you feel itch, and it will obviously create the same cycle from itchy to scars all over again. until the scars covered all of your body.
As in gosip, the more you do it the more you want to collect more of it and spread of it until it a "gossiper" become your signature character. =D

ewww, i believe you dont want the ugly scars affecting your beautiful appearance. please please bear the itchiness with me, =D i need a friend who can stand with me in this itchiness now. IT IS SUPPER ITCHY.... and lets bear ourselves from the desire of doing gossip, i believe none of us want the bitterness disease that caused by doing gossip will affecting our physical appearance and robing the beauty of God given joy inside us.

Memberi Dalam Kekurangan

2011-03-08T08:03:00.000-08:00

Giving is not always an easy things to do for every person. The matter of amount to give, the occasion, the necessity or many things else affecting the willingness of an individual to give. however most people will feel it easy to give after they received something.
The question is can we give in when even ourselves is in need?

Mark 12: 44 ''They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything--all she had to live on."

The story of The widow's offering could be a good role model for us related to the topic of giving when we are in need, because out of her needs and poverty she could give offering with all of her heart, while many other people give according to what they have and their wealth and their riches.

Let say that we are in a situation where we don't have that much cash, we walk around a mall and suddenly we see something that we think it could bless a person heart if we buy and give it to that person. It is maybe because they like it or they need it.
But actually, we are in need of something else.
How many of us choose to put aside our own agenda and choose to get that thing and bless that person heart by giving the thing that they need and they like?

Another scenario, let say that we just had a break up that make us upset and sad and disappointed and we think that we have all the right to be comforted and cared by other people. Suddenly, one of our friend text us and ask us whether we have time to talk or not, because He/She needs a person to talk to. It might be He/She having serious problem with the family, losing someone, etc. How many of us choose to put aside our problem and choose to listen to that person?

Some of us might refuse to put aside our own agenda and problem. Maybe because we think that we could only afford to buy the small teddy bear rather that the big teddy bear, then there is no point to give. or because we think that we also have a serious problem and we think that we could not think properly to arrange any wise word as an advice for our friends then there is no point to respond to the invitation.

The point is not how expensive the thing that we bought for that person or how powerful our advice for that person. It is about our heart willingness.

I believe the teddy bear lover friend wont mind the small teddy bear. At least, He/She will know that we care and remember about her.
I believe the other person wont mind to only have us listen and look at her eyes when she telling you her story, He/She might just need a person to share her problem with and feel relieved after share to us.

God loves a cheerful giver who willing to give with all of their heart no matter what the circumstances are, because He wants us to put our faith in Him for all that we need.

We don't need to be worry when we are in need because God is our portion, He is our provider who always provide all our needs. He is our father who always love us no matter what, He will provide us the love, care, comfort, financial, or anything that we need in a right time and in a right amount according to His richness and our capacity in Him.

After all giving is a realization of love.
By a sincere giving we are telling the person who receive that we love them.

-CarolinE-

Love is waiting - Brooke Fraser

2011-03-07T02:04:00.000-08:00

In the autumn on the ground, between the traffic and the ordinary sounds
I am thinking signs and seasons while a north wind blows through
I watch as lovers pass me by
Walking stories - whos and hows and whys
Musing lazily on love
Pondering you
I’ll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it’s time to walk that way we wanna walk it well

[CHORUS]
I’ll be waiting for you baby
I’ll be holding back the darkest night
Love is waiting ‘til we’re ready, ‘til it’s right
Love is waiting

It’s my caution not the cold
There’s no other hand that I would rather hold
The climate changes, I’m singing for strangers about you
Don’t keep time, slow the pace
Honey hold on if you can
The bets are getting surer now that you’re my man

[CHORUS]

[BRIDGE]
I could write a million songs about the way you say my name
I could live a lifetime with you and then do it all again
And like I can’t force the sun to rise or hasten summer’s start,
Neither should I rush my way into your heart

Kiss The Rain

2011-02-14T09:54:00.000-08:00

This is for you, yes you!

2010-12-14T03:55:00.000-08:00

MOCCA - ON THE NIGHT LIKE THIS LYRICS

On the night like this
There's so many things I want to tell you
On the night like this
There's so many things I want to show you

Cause when you're around
I feel safe and warm
Cause when you're around
I can fall in love every day

In the case like this
There are a thousand good reasons
I want you to stay...

Luck Vs Blessing

2010-12-13T04:36:00.000-08:00

How do we respond on good things that came to us?
was it "wow, what a luck"?
Then how do we respond to bad things happened to us or when we don't do well?
If we always consider good things that happened to us as "luck'', most probably we will consider the bad thing as the opposite of luck.
Then the possible respond of that bad thing might be "what a curse?", "such a bad day", "that was bad luck'' or anything negative as the opposite of the positive outcomes. Are they sound constructing to us?
When we think that its a curse that came to us, what are the possibilities we will going to do? because a curse sounds so permanent, the most possible thing we are about to do is to accept the fact and deal to hold it on. With the pain, with the guilt, with the disappointment or anything.
All the negative respond above slower our process to rise up. Because our primary focus is "acceptance"only.

When we think we are lucky, it will sounds like everything that we achieve or gain is from ourselves, because of us good on this or that, known by....., loved by....., or anything I I I , Me Me Me....
Then when we failed we will either blame ourselves back, or blame people or even the situation. In fact that will help us nothing but bonding us with revenge, deep grievance, low self esteem, or bitterness.

In the other hand if we expand our heart and mind to find everything that come to us as a blessing, it is possible for us to take things when we didn't do well as a blessing too instead of nonconstructive responds. The blessing that we received is not because of who we are or what we do but simply God's grace.
God will never harm us, His purpose in our life is always good. always.....

When we failed it is actually a learning process for us.
There must be good reasons behind it.
There must be something greater revealed in the right time and in the right place.

To take failure as a blessing is to acknowledge failure as a stepping stone, a new lesson for us to learnt and for us to be a better person or for us to be use more by God.
Instead of revenge, bitterness, long last sorrow or anything caused by false respond to failure, we will experience new things for us to enhance our knowledge on certain things and enhance our capacity to be a better person to be used more by God and to do more for people.

Pray Praise Worship

2010-12-06T21:39:00.000-08:00

This is how I get my strength
This is how my spirit recharge
This is how I learn about wisdom
This is how the word patient rise up in me
This is how I get peace
This is how I get joy
This is how I am defined

This is how I am prepared
This is how I get vision for next move
This is how I give thanks
This is how I complaint
This is how I am connected
This is how I am communicate
This is how I love and learn the love more
This is how I am loved
This is how I am cared
This is the foundation of my faith
By dwelling in the presence of Yours

When I started to lose my joy. I'll go straight to prayer to communicate and grab the Father's love then go to a fellowship to interact and grab the love from people. My Joy will not only come back but strengthened then I can love God and people more.

Relationship Wisdom

2010-12-06T08:18:00.000-08:00

Relationships in any form is one of human basic needs. without building good relationship, it is impossible for any human being to fulfill their physiological, safety, belonging, esteem and self actualization needs (based on Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

To fulfill Physiological needs (The most basic needs of human) which are health, food, sleep and many other thing which consider as "a must" needs to fulfilled in order to keep alive. In this case how can we get food, place to sleep and proper health if we don't "work for or work to or work with" other people to get the material to get those things?
Don't we need to establish good relationship to our boss, colleague or customers/client to get the material (money) to get food, place to sleep, and health matter.

We human also have the needs of belongings as wanting to feel love and loved, care and cared one to another. In order to fulfill this needs of course we need any kind of relationship as our subject of love and care and also the source for us to feel so.
We needs people to actualize and realize our capabilities and potential.
We needs people to learn from and learn with.
We might be able to do good in a lot of things but it doesn't mean that we could do good in everything.
That is why we need one another, to build connection one another through any kind of relationships. Family, Friends, Partner, Spouse, Neighbor, or any kind relationship are meant to be maintained well in order for us to fulfill the hierarchy of needs.
To have a strong relationship what we need to do is:

To communicate as to be slow to speak and quick to listen, to tell and communicate truth. replacing "I, me, my, mine" to "you, yours, he/she, hers/his".
To be interested to people and their life. Not only focus on our life and problems because everyone has their own problem.
To make people feel important
To pour smile when we meet people
To encourage people
To look for the point of agreement in every conversation
To respect others
To esteem others better than ourself
To use people's name frequently
To be complimentary towards others

If there are more people who apply relationship wisdom in their daily interaction, the world will be a better place. It is not an easy things to do, that is why we need to get back to whom relationships are made by. Only one can love us unconditionally, lets learn from Him on how to love without any reason. For no matter what we do, He'll always love us. Can we love people who hurt us, leave us, reject us or anything?
The answer is "No we can't"do it alone", but it will not be impossible if we not cling on our strength fully only. His wisdom, care, love will give us power to love people more.

Special thanks to Daniel Watania who preached about "building life that impacts culture" 4th Dec 2010, in deed it gv me idea what to write. =)

Good News

2010-12-04T05:33:00.000-08:00

Isn't it a good news?
Doesn't matter where we run away from God, He will be there in the end of the tunnel of our running trail.

He is waiting there to embrace us and won't let us go too far.

Will we accept his wide open hand?

Doesn't matter what we've done.

Abide His will, hurting him, or fail him.

But, His love will never fail.

Unconditionally he'll pour his greater love for no matter what.
He strengthen us, give us hope, peace and joy through His love.

Will we humble enough to open our heart for his love?

Doesn't matter where we go, He will walk with us..

Any direction that we planned. He will guide us to the right direction, remind us when we are about to lost.

Or give us another greater direction when we lost ours.

Will we hear His guidance?

Doesn't matter when we fall, He'll cover us.

So then we won't crash the ground and broken into pieces.

When we think we don't have anymore strength to get back standing, He will carry us up.

And surely He will heal our brokenness.

Healing process is painful, but will we trust him enough to let the healing process take place and not giving up to alternatives?

Isn't it a good news that as His son and daughter we don't need to do too much than accepting his love and respond to his care and guidance?

LOVE is AROUND

2010-12-01T23:31:00.000-08:00

We are on the last month of 2010 now!! yeay!!
November just passed with a lot off things happening, to my self and to people around me.
And somehow i just think that there are quite numbers of (i call it) "losing" cases that i heard or even experienced.

Some people experienced the lost of someone close to them who come back to the God in Heaven. And some people experienced the lost of relationship.

Kind a heard the sounds of brokenhearted around, where people cry to get help, strength, love, care, restoration and healing. Funny that i have been through it and know exactly how the uncomfortable feeling of broken heart is, but found it hard to pull out the word of encouragement to the people around.

I might not that good in transfer information or encouragement face to face, but i hope some of you will read this and feel encouraged and strengthened.

"Hei there, you are not alone"
There are numbers of people who lost the people their love in this universe. We might think that our losing case is too hard for us, but you gtta know and remember that the problem that come into our life will never exceed our capacity. Problems come together with the help, solution and lesson for us to learn. Its just whether we see it coming as how the help, solution and lesson are meant to be or we respond it the other way.
in this point of time, let us not focus on those who leave but let focus more in what we do have around us and start to appreciate them. Because if we keep stuck on the ''lost'' and the pain, we won't see help or any good things coming for us. Everything will be negative things.
We will respond to it in a wrong way.
This is actually the best time to appreciate things that we have which have been ignored or slightly replace before.

"Hei there, Dont do it alone!!"
Of course we cannot do it by our own strength, we need the people around us. This is the time for us to open our eyes and ears to see and know who is around? and who cares about me?
And the most important, we cant forget that we need God.
This is when we are in the weakest and lowest point of our life then the sensitiveness level to feel God's love is strong...
Again, its just how we respond to the love that given to us..
God's love is new every morning... come to Him, let him restore us to see things that unseen before and see what direction that He intended us to go now. Let His love renew us as He pour out His mercy, grace, forgiveness, peace, joy, strength and wisdom to face another day of our life.

"Hei there, lets rise up and do more great things in life!"
We cannot stop here, life must go on. Don't let the "losing" of some part in our life bring another part of us together with them. If we let it happen, then what we have left? we are just about to lose everything in our life...
Nah, there is hope... Huge hope for us!!
With the right respond to God's brand new love in everyday in our life and with the right appreciation to the people around us and the other things that we have in our life, we will not only restored and recovered from the pain but we will could help others who still in pain to rise up and recover.

Lets start to Love God and people more!!
Lets help people to love God and other people more!!
Lets spread the good news that love of God and love of people is around!

What Do We Have?

2010-11-22T19:41:00.000-08:00

Have you ever feel uncertain of yourself?
The times when we think that we don't have anything we are good at.
And future seems so vogue because we think that we don't have anything we could work on for our future.

The scripture says in Deuteronomy 28:13 "The LORD will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the LORD your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will be at the top, never at the bottom"

That is the promise of God to us. That God will succeed us. but how can we be success when we think that we don't have anything we are good at?
The thing is "success in life is not as much about what you have as it is about God's anointing on what you have" Joel Osteen

We might think that what we have is nothing but ordinary. we can only do this or that a little.
Its not about what we have and how much we are good at it, God can turn ordinary into extraordinary.

"What you have may not look like much , but with God's anointing Is everything you need" Joel Osteen

Another thing we cant forget is the part "If you pay attention to the commands of the LORD your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them" God want us to do it God's way .. not our way .. however, we cant put success as a reward after we do it God's way. because the truth is we already have it. it just that we need to look around, see what we have and then work for it God's way.

God is able to just simply give us success. But God love us too much to let us simply get it then we don't know how enjoy our success rightly.
God want us to be success with character which build upon trials after trials, difficulties after difficulties to achieve.
Character that build from our respond to everything that come to us before we achieve.
The question is are we going to respond it God's way?

"If we do it God's way, the result is God's result"

Boys are Stronger Than Girls? Please...

2010-11-10T04:35:00.000-08:00

Can you bleed for a week and survive?
Can you squeeze a 14 inch baby from a 9 centimeter hole?
Can you carry a 7 pound baby in your stomach for 9 months?
Can you take care of a child, cook, clean and talk on the phone at once? Can you carry 108 pound shopping bags?
Can you go a week only eating salad?
Can you face a heartbreak?
Can you watch the love of your life be with someone else?
Can you burn your forehead with a straightener and not complain?
Can you wear a thing piece of string in your a** all day?
Can you walk all day on 6 inch stilettos?
Can you cry all night then wake up the next morning like everything's okay?
I don't think so!

a broadcast message I've receive from my friend ani.. =) nice joke in between assignment hehehe,, sorry boys..

to See Extraordinary behind Ordinary

2010-11-09T23:05:00.000-08:00

On my previous post Ive been mentioning that during our weakest point of our life our level of sensitiveness towards God are high.
yes that God wants us to come to Him in our brokenness but it doesn't always mean He wants us to come only when we are brokenhearted.
some people come to God in their happiest moment to give thanks, yes that God want us to remember Him in good or bad and us being grateful will please God. but it doesn't always mean that He wants us to come only when we are happy or sad only.

in life there must be a time when we feel everything is normal and nothing much happen. when people ask "hi how was your weekend?" then we will answer with "well, nothing much happened just this and that" we feel like there is nothing special or important happened during that day. that we are looking for an extraordinary happiness or extraordinary sadness that worth to remember and worth to say.

in that situation we feel like we don't even have much things to say. there s nothing much to thanks for and there is nothing much to ask from because we think that we are good and everything went so smooth.

i just realize that this few days i missed my vertical communication. assignment and many things happening make me feel super tired in the end of the day. there is nothing much happening lately, Ive been actually avoid my self from extreme emotional thing to happen so then i can be more focus on things that i should focus on. been keeping my self busy until i am really busy and missed my pray. i thought it should be okay, because there is nothing too sad or nothing to happy happen.

In fact, its not only in our happiest or saddest moment in our life that we need to be worry to come to God to say gratitude or asking forgiveness or asking help or anything. In fact we suppose to be more worried when we feel that everything is normal and not much things happening in our life. we suppose to look better inside, on whether our heart still properly function (have the right sensitiveness level) towards God's work in our life?.

in our life there is nothing ordinary, everything that God has planned for us are extraordinary.
as what David said in Psalm 139:14 "I praise You because i am fearfully and wonderfully made"
in Thesaurus dictionary (which the only dictionary i have at home, lol) wonderful mean "magnificent, superb, glorious, sublime, lovely, delightful, super, great, fantastic, terrific, tremendous, sensational, fabulous, awesome"
because we are God's masterpiece, He wont let ordinary thing happen to our life. All are wonderful. but then again it come back to how we react to things that happened to us... most of us choose to see in our own perception rather than God's point of view.

but then, how in the earth we know God's point of view? we are human and not God.
that is why we need to constantly communicate with God.
it is by praying we are communicating with God.
some of us might think that praying is only about us talking with God. how is it make sense that God is talking back to us? its not that we will hear God talking with a physical voice in 2010 like how God talking with moses in old testament.

Actually praying is a two way communication between us and God. by conducting a constant praying we will have the sense of intimacy with God. God talk to us in many ways, through people, environment, problems, and many thing else, then God gives us bible as a guideline and direction to turn things that happen to us into the right interpretation of what God's message behind all things that happen to us thru people, problems or anything.

although what happen to us seems not important and small and mundane. its just how are we going to look at it is matter. can we see the interesting behind mundane? the extraordinary behind ordinary?
are we going to choose to still living the song of life that God has put in our life. In our happiness, our mundane, and our saddest stage in our life. and keep update Him with smallest to biggest thing happening because behind all that importance level of things happening in our life there is the same big portion that God has prepared for us.

some words are hard to say

2010-11-07T09:20:00.000-08:00

Berpisah Feat Nita

Dygta

Kau menyentuh hatiku lagi
Ketika semua berakhir
Ku tak mengerti
Kau s’lalu tanyakan padaku
Tentang semua yg kurasa
Kau merindukanku
Aku pun memang merindukanmu

Semestinya kau tak peduli
Tentang perasaanku
Tentang cintaku
Dan harusnya kau mengerti
Semua tlah berlalu
Ku melepas cintamu
Kita memang harus berpisah

Tak mudah untuk (tak mudah untuk)
Menjalani semua (jalani semua)
Karna hatiku dan cintaku
Hanya untukmu

Namun jalanku tak searah denganmu
Sungguh ku pun terluka
Karna kita memang berbeda

Mengertilah semua yang kulakukan untukmu
Namun yang terbaik
S’lamanya kita berpisah

Semestinya kau tak peduli
Tentang perasaanku
Tentang cintaku
Dan harusnya kau mengerti
Semua tlah berlalu
Ku melepas cintamu
Kita memang harus berpisah

Hu.. Hu.. Berpisah..

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding"

2010-11-07T04:23:00.000-08:00

as much as i want to hear about you.. i better not to.. because once i did, i need to take sometime to balance my pace.. n tonight i need that sometime for assignment..

post-break up stage.
i would say not an easy thing for me. especially during assignment and fyp period like this.. ive quite distracted by it.

the situation is, me dealing with my weakness of not moving on and not letting go. its been like five different goodbyes which failed one by one. i know it is not good for me and him. found out that he already try to get to know someone else, made me decide in another step. on backing my self off of him, by might giving him space and time to move on.

it is very hard for me. not to contact him. asking how has he been doing. hows his day.
it is very hard for me not replying his msg and not picking up his phone call. took me thousands courage not to failed on this goodbye attempt.

facebook remind me of him a lot, ive decided to deactivated. apart from that deactivating facebook also help me to focus more on my assignment. but its not that easy, once my friends update me with anything that he is doing on facebook, making me rattled many times. took me sometime to balance up my pace.

well the point is, sometimes i dont understand why m i in this situation. why me? why now during assignment and fyp period? why should i totally ignore when its actually hurting me? it is hurting me and burdening me, the guilty feeling and the broken heart.

today i feel it so disturbing me.. i have submission tomorrow, but someone and something remind me of him until all the memories came and i cant concentrate.

i dnt think talking with anyone for right now is a good idea, its too "weepy" and "silly" and "weak" stories to tell. but VOILA.. m telling this to the whole world now..

i tell you what happened.. =)
i know one who wont think this is too not important to tell and one who understand me more than anyone near to me, is my creator Himself.
so then, i prayed. started with a song.. then amazed by the words in the songs

"God of my all i've surrendered, my heart find its rest in Your word
praises will not be enough to show how my love for you has grown
nothing matter when you are here with me
in the end just to hear you say well done. bowing before your throne" (God of my youth-chc)

"God of my all i've surrendered" .. when i feel powerless (d0nt know how to do), hopeless (dont know who to talk to) and i feel like i am nothing (not a good student, not even start my assignmemt due tomorrow).. God use this situation to talk to me, a situation when my level of sensitiveness towards God are high..

"my heart find its rest in Your word" .. ive suddenly remembered this verse "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding" Prov 3:5 sometimes i dont understand a lot of things happening to our life.. and yea what we should do is not lean to our own understanding, it will make us think that we are an ultimate victim. but we should trust in the Lord that He is doing something great for us and prepare us to be a victor and not a victim.
the verse linked me to another song

"Heal my heart and make it clean, open up my eyes to the things unseen. show me how to love like You have loved me" (Hosanna-Hillsong)

i really love the bridge part of this song... really tells a lot.. =)
it says "heal my heart and make it clean, open up my eyes to the things unseen"
we might not see what God is doing for us, what kind of future awaits us ahead but this song tells me not to lean on my own eyes, but see the unseen one which is God's purpose on us which is "good purpose and never not a good purpose" thats what He is been doing all about.
we cant see our future but God does.
we are going from one point of our life to another point towards God.

us..........................................................................................................................God

if we walk towards God's calling, our future is God's history so then we just need to trust God.

healing process not easy. still feel like something plugged out from inside me and its an empty hole with painful fresh scars there. it is hard but what i should do now is trust God.. He is my healer. =)

Puiy Bday edition !! =)

2010-11-04T20:57:00.000-07:00

My dear puiy... Happy 21th bday.. Yeay legal age huh? M excited for you cuhz I know greater things are happening and yet to happen to your life. Be prepare deary, be ready for it.. With God strength you will face the preparation process. Keep strong in Him, keep your song in Him.. For it is what keep your joy and fire stay on! keep being a blessing cuhz the world need more people like you to be a better place. A person who is sincere to love, a person who is caring a person who is strong in her stand, a person who loves her God with all her might, a person who is good friend to almost everyone, a person who always there for her besties, a person who will always remind me when m off tune and off track, a person who is natalia putri tampubolon will always be. I love you puiy, may God blessing and joy and peace are upon you. And let God set your beautiful future with His mighty name.. And you will progressing and not regressing. Be the head and not the tail.. Cuhz that's His promise to you.. Cast out all your worries by His mighty name.. It is not worth to hold too long..

This is the time for you to rise up.. Doing more for God...

Let your 21th age be more and more fruitful in many thing... Kudos! You've been through 20 years of your life. N you did great! I am proud of you my puiy.. Enjoy bday and enjoy 21th One thing from me.. Let me be part of your 21th age and your next next age. Cuhz m here for a long run to be your best friend. :) I love you my sobi in christ!! Kisses!! Hugs!!

WE NEED TO GET BACK TO THE FIRST TIME

2010-11-01T05:43:00.000-07:00

Why relationship and friendship ended? Why people back slide faith? Why divorce happened?why family separated? Why a lot of student leave school?

Its just people forgot how to get back to the first time.. The first time when they experience their nervousness of their early stage romance relationship, when they realized that they have someone to talk to to share thought with and also to strengthen each other. the sensation of early marriage on how they been blessed havin a partner to draw the plan to build a happy family together, the excitement getting their own precious baby and the wonder on how will they grow and how they become in the future. the rush of entering the 1st day of school, college life, new jobs.
The first time they know God, founded & chosen to experience Indescribable feeling of love acceptance forgiveness that no human being could ever compare, not even by our lovely parents, ultimate friends, family or lover. We have Gifted by a package of life such as our whole physical form, soul, spirit, surroundings, future, problems as a life lesson together with the help and guide, and many more great things in our life including that every first time experiences happened in our life. We have given so much from God, blessed tremendously..

Maybe God made all the first time experience distinctive and memorable cuhz He want us to remember to be thankful all d time of the blessings.

Gratitude of blessing usually strengthen us.
But then why life still heavy and Miserable? Breach and failure still happen?

Maybe because we forgot how we have felt so blessed when the "first time" happened in our life.. How the sensation usually made us happy, jumping, motivated, strong, certain, loved, smart or anything...

=) why don't we appreciate the previous blessing given to us by recall it over and over to make the blessing continually tangible in our life.
Tho the journey we have faced not all the time pleasant.. But why don't we keep our focus to the good thing? Put aside bitterness for the sake of makin life better...

"To make a relationship work, focus on what you appreciate about the other person, and not your complaints. -Rhonda Byrne"

Getting back to the first time will not only letting us to show more gratitude to God for what He have given but it will actually fix a broken relationship.

Be blessed!!!!

the power of being thankful

2009-09-16T08:14:00.000-07:00

l0ng time haven't check my blog... was having a very busy month... examination month... =) anyway my point in this posting is the power of being thankful... i just remembered about it , right after i checked this blog five minutes a go.. i red my latest post.. about, being far from God.. on the first point, i menti0ned my disappointment getting B grade.. but on the middle of the post, i mentioned about fixing your relationship with God will help u in every facets of your life including study .. therefore, that time i started to be thankful for having B grade.. well B is not a failure... B is a pass.. =)... u knw wht... the power of being thankful?? God will see the faith in u.. and definitely God wont ignore u... because He knw that u remember Him in good and worst ... that week we need to submit the hard copy of the presentation to the lecture.. and i heard that if we change the material on the presentation slide, whit something that is better than the one we presented , we will get a higher marks.. eventhough i dont hear the information direct from the lecture... i did change the material of the presentation.. so then we submit the work after some changes... we didnt expect a high grade.. but at least he will change the grade to B+ seeing our effort on the changes,,, two weeks after the submition one of our group member happily came to me and fatin, said that the grade increased to an A... PRAISE GOD..... it's even more than our expectation.. =)... welll... this is what i mean by the power of being thankful...

yes, we need God

2009-07-19T21:10:00.000-07:00

i just realize that when your relationship with God isnt good, your relationship with your family friends, study, etc wont feel good,,,
based on my latest feelin,,, that my relationship with God isnt good,, its affected my other relationship...
1. last week we had a presentation, while everyone got A i just gettin B..i felt terrible,,, m i that stupid??
2. just now i called my dad, but i dont know that i felt like he dont wnna talk to me... and its very hard to contact him,, to make him answer my phone.. i felt sad, because usually i called him like everyday
3. i get offended easily by my friends lately... =(
i was wondering alot "Wht s wrong with me?" until i realize that ive been out of track, n i need to get back to my actual track,,,,
i realized that the problem im facing right now, r not a new problem.. that i experienced it many times.. but the i things that i forgotten was that when the problem came to me in the past... i have a good relationship with God and i didnt feel that the problem is a problem for me...
for example;
1. if i have a good relationship with God, i will have God remind me in every situation i am in.. when everyone get A and i get B.. God will remind me to be thankful in everysituation because everysituation is a lesson.. that from the failure i learn that i did somethin wrong so then i wont repeat the same mistake in the future.. in fact B isnt a failure rigt,,, B is a pass,,,pass is better than failure,, n lesson and experience is also better than an A....
2. when happen to me that my dad not in the mood to talk to me,, if i have a good communication with God, God will remind me that everyone has their own problem.. so instead of condemning them, why dont we just pray for them, be an encouragement for them, be a bless for them??
3. when i get offended by my friend God will remind me that it s a lesson for me to be learn to be more patient. being patient is the a good thing to be use in every situation.. business situation, competition situatiion, etc..
4. when i felt afar from God, God will remind me that in every problem and situation that God let us in, He has His purpose behind it.. n God's plan is always beautiful.....

there is another situation that when i am afar from God i am still in a good condition,, in study, family or friend,,
but suddenly i realized that at that time, eventhough my grade is good,, my relationship with my family and friends s going well..
but, didnt i realize that there is somethin wrong deep inside my heart,,
the feelin of emptiness, the feelin that i have somethin missing, the feelin of never completed that wht ive been achieved, always not enough for me... n i end up with seeking n seeking it until i dont know wht direction i headin to,,that if i dont reach that goals,, m no special..
friends, we r special,, in God's eyes.... thats why He created us and this universe... =)...
so.....yes, we need God.....

another sat nite,,,,

2009-07-19T19:38:00.000-07:00

watched 2 movies in one night,, love public enemy and so does harry potter...
also love pavilion for the mega sale,, hehehe,,,,

wht i wore saturday night out(please refer to "saturday night out" post

2009-07-14T22:27:00.000-07:00

my apologize due to some error that i cant upload another picture on my previous post, i put my pictures in this post,,, =) ah ya, i forgot to include the info about the bad and shoes. bag: Anya Hindmarch bag , i dont know the price, cuhz the bag is a birthday present on my 18th bday from my beloved friend, shandy... thx mamuu,,, i so love the bag.... hehehhehehe shoes: topshop (forgot the price) hihiiii.... fyi: Mega Sale on Malaysia,,,,,, =)..... happy happy

saturday night out!! (Late Post)

2009-07-14T21:27:00.000-07:00

just watched this movie on saturday night,,, the movie is about A new temp at an asset management firm develops an unhealthy crush on a successful and married businessman (Source: Sony Pictures Releasing International.

the movie was quite nice,,, i like the guy, he is a loyal type of husband,, even he'd been tempted many time by lisa(ali larter), he still in his stand. that a kind of husband i lookin for in the future.

the outting wear was my nu forever21 skirt and also forever21 very cheap shirt... i was quite surprised when coincidently found those outfit the week before..
thw timing was at the mall clossing time... i was lookin for somethin to wear for the following day, cuhz i sleep over at sfriend's. then m lookin for somethin cheap,, ehehee,, that at the first touch in the first row i found the skirt with only RM55, and the shirt at the next row with only
RM19.90....... hahhaha,, no need to try on,, found the smallest size n proceed to the cashier,,, yeay,,

a memory of my beloved phone

2009-07-14T20:56:00.000-07:00

guess wht!! m a phoneless girl now... huhuu so sad,,
i just lost my beloved blackberry last week on Friday.
i love my phone tho.... i will never ever forget u BB, ,,,,

wake up keiy!!!!!

2009-07-10T20:50:00.000-07:00

huahhhhhwwmmmm just woke up, from a long sleep!!!!
n frankly speakin m not feelin fresh at all,, still need anotha sleep...
yea m wishing for a long pause from pressure here....
was kind a have a hectic week ....
1. just entered my hectic due date assignment month (july-august) ... i have 7 assignment (1 done n 6 to do), some presentation and class tests!!! and yesterday is one of my assignment submission day.. i've finished the freakin things last week before my brother's visit but left out the last number and conclussion part,, eventhough i just need to to part of it i stiil took the whole my rest night yesterday,,,,, i didnt sleep at all,,, and for the first time "I LOVE Coffee" , they freaking helping me yesterday.. hihihihiiiiiiii..... m headin to another assignment now... E-Commerce m commin' ..
good day all!!